This is where I start

Updated: May 24

I’m watching a show on television about a woman who is speaking to the man who appears to be intended to become her confidant in treatment. I am identifying with everything she is saying, everything she’s thinking, feeling, doing and I’m understanding why someone would speak the way that she speaks.

I know that I used to speak the way that she is speaking now. I know why she’s doing what she’s doing and what is happening in her own mind. I remember that being me at one time.

I’m thinking if that’s who I once was, who am I now? And how did I get from there to here? That is genuinely what I want my second book to address.

However, I’m having trouble organizing the things that I need to say. I have so much to say on so very many different topics. I am having trouble putting some of them into any kind of category.

How do I put all these wild thoughts together in one place and then organize them to be something that someone else will someday use as their own survival guide.

It makes sense when I say it out loud but it doesn’t make any sense in my mind.

Now, if I can’t make sense out of me, how will I ever expect that from anybody else. I’m Not sure where to start? Not sure where to end?

Through this, I can now say that this must mean I’m smack in the middle of the events of which I hope to start making sense.

I know I’m still living it. I know I’m not the person that I once was anymore. But I’m not the person that I am intended to be just yet.

I don’t really know what else I’m going to need to go through to get to the final version or, frankly, if there even is a final finding this venue being my next therapeutic path.

I will continue this to the end, have no doubt. I’m sure we are all anxious to know the end results.

I hear you,



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Off the Dance Floor: The First Heat - Kindle edition by ,deMichelle. Literature & Fiction Kindle eBooks @

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